Reflections On Performing Live

by michael

I played the second show of four that I am playing this month. I thought I’d share some thoughts I am having right now about it all.

I’d love to hear others who are musically inclined weigh in with their own experience. (Or if there are parallels to other hobbies/disciplines, I’d love to hear that too). Keep in mind that these shows are small-time deals. 10-20 people there.

On how well my music works as a one man band

This obviously subjective topic is obviously up to the listener to decide. But I’ll just note a few things:

  • Pre-recorded backup material is dangerous ground to tread on. It can be boring. It can lead to awkward mistakes live. To try to counteract this boredom, I am trying to stick to drumbeats and bass lines, and to leave any lead instrument to myself. I’m also trying to stick with digital sounds, and not anything that’s supposed to sound realistic. The reasoning being the same reason why MIDI versions of real instruments are usually disappointing. (I once saw a band use midi Trumpets and it was really, really cheesy.)
  • I am wary of looping-pedal-fests. I have seen this stuff done really well sometimes (Andrew Bird is a notable example) but I usually do not enjoy one-man-bands in the form of looping parts. It’s kind of like “hang on a minute while I get my song going, dude.”
  • It’s hard to translate my full-band songs into interesting one-man versions. I write songs that use drums, electric guitars, multiple keyboard instruments, and multi-vocal lines and harmonies. Shrinking it down can sometimes destroy the soul of the song.
  • I tend to default to simple, finger-picking acoustic songs. These are nice, but I think it will be rare that this is all that enrapturing for a listener.

On friends at shows

I’m going to say something that I hate but it’s also something I do and have done. You have my full admission of hypocrisy up front. I hate it when people don’t pay attention and are clearly having full discussions or are incessantly texting during a show. It feels even worse when I watch the video of the show and I can barely hear my performance over the loud chatters of half my friends.

But let me be clear about this reflection:

  1. I am thankful for the support of my friends, even if they aren’t interested in my music. Friend-rock, as Sufjan Stevens describes it, is the phenomenon that happens when your friends come to your show and support you, but don’t really care for your music. It happens. I’ve been in that spot. I’ve gone to a friend’s show even though I wasn’t the biggest fan of their music. There’s no reason to feel guilty about this. People like what they like.
  2. It is (to some degree) up to me to be interesting enough to be worth giving attention to. It’s not as though I think I can sit on stage and play a dreadfully slow, repetitive, and flat song for 15 minutes and then expect full, enraptured attention by everyone there. This point applies especially to strangers. If I want their attention I have to earn it.
  3. I am not a live show nazi. Aside from enjoying the chance to share my work with others, I want shows to be fun. I can’t imagine myself ever saying something on stage to kill the mood or complain to the crowd.
  4. For some, a show is nice background music to the real business of enjoying a drink with a friend. Part of going to a bar and seeing a performance is often the fun of taking it in with a friend. Have a beer. Catch up.
  5. In any case, this is something that isn’t going to change.

But, none of these facts eliminate the reality that it hurts to perform and to see people not really give it any attention, respect, or much of a chance.

Before anyone grabs their pitchforks to announce my self-righteousness, hypocrisy, or naivete about this, remember that I admit up front that I am guilty of this, that I am aware this will always happen no matter what, and that I realize it’s not worth worrying about.

On singing in a live performance

I don’t have the best voice in the world. No, that’s dressing things up too much. My live singing voice is spotty, depending on the context. Sometimes it’s downright bad. I may hit the pitches most of the time but what is needed is the extra oomph, the gut, the emotion that slides along with whatever song style is happening. I feel like I’m typically just giving a functional performance, but rarely taking it to that magical level.

Recording, though, I can accommodate my mediocre voice with the increased ability to focus on nailing a singing part. I mention this not as some kind of boring (false?) modesty, but because something occurred to me. When recording, I can relax and focus. Live, I am typically “winging it” by having to pick a guitar, play a keyboard, or something else. It’s multitasking.

I think my difficulties with live singing have more to do with my comfort level playing these other instruments, and not so much with my voice itself. The (limited) potential of my vocal talent aside, I think I can sing better than I usually do live. The problem is I need to learn how to be relaxed, smoothly playing everything. The kind of relaxed where you know what you’re doing so well that it’s instinctual and muscle memory — NOT intellectual processing.

Ok, let’s just cut to the chase: I just need to practice. But not just running through songs. I need to practice being in the moment, sunken into the fabric of the song. Ok, enough mumbo jumbo.

On not having a full band to peform my music

It sucks. Anyone want to play music with me?